3 – if you’re good, Santa might bring you a banana slicer

The banana slicer – because there is nothing in the world that you could possibly use it for except slicing bananas. Mama used to call them “toe covers.” Things that are inescapably un-useful.

I’m sending this to my children as well, because a) I love them and b) they never call… they never write… ha! Guilt.  Funny how much more you miss people because they’re on the other side of the world. Kelsey’s in the Army, John’s in the Air Force, and they’re both stationed in Germany now.  They were able to spend Thanksgiving together, which made us very happy–if we couldn’t see them, they could at least see each other.

Hope all you victims (ahem, readers, sorry!) had a lovely Thanksgiving.  Ours was quiet–mine was mostly spent avoiding the thing that Corey had experimented on earlier in the week, which he insisted on calling turkey loaf. Creating it involved a crock pot, a turkey breast, stuffing, shredding, bone removal and then putting it into a casserole dish in the refrigerator, wrapped very tightly in plastic wrap, and watching it solidify.  Over three days.  I love him with all my heart and soul.  Truly I do.  I had a cheese sandwich instead.  He insists it tasted good.  I believe him, but that would be because I signed a piece of paper saying I would.

I am NOT in any way complaining about having a man around who cooks.  My own history of culinary experimentation included one disgraceful episode with fried chicken that still makes me flinch. Once the drumstick got as big around as my arm, I realized that using Bisquick (which rises with heat and moisture) was not a good idea.  Nor, in the end, was it edible.  One more of those things we can add to the list of “stuff we don’t talk about.” o_O

On another note, we’re excited about our plans for Christmas, which involve first, 16 days off.  You heard me right.  16 DAYS OFF.  Can’t repeat it enough… We’re off to Las Vegas on Christmas Day, where Corey’s sis Erin and her husband John are joining us, though staying in a different hotel.  We’ve got tickets for a Penn and Teller show for the night of the 26th.  The 27th, we’ll pick up Erin and John and drive about six hours to the Rancho Vistoso, near Tucson, .  The Hannon reunion will take place there from the 27th through the 3rd of January.  Really looking forward to seeing a bunch of Corey’s family, and especially his dad, who we haven’t seen since our wedding–so wish our kids could be there, but neither one could get the leave to come stateside…

But, that’s part of life and growing up, and particularly part of being in the military.  I was John’s age when I was stationed in England the first time–and wrote some very dark poetry about how lonely I was… ah, the drama of youth. 🙂  Luckily, I now sublimate the urge to write any kind of poetry at all into e-mails like this one.  Just realized a minute ago that I was nostalgic for the time when everyone wrote e-mails instead of posting on Facebook.  Life moves pretty dang fast.  Just yesterday I was mourning over the fact that no one sends Christmas cards anymore.  And then we got one. 😀

Last but not least, as a card-carrying member of those with Adult Attention Deficit Disorder, I am, occasionally, guilty of just following pig trails around the web… I came across this through one of those journeys that I and my fellow AADD sufferers trudge through:  May I introduce you to the Hutzler banana slicer.  The product itself is funny… but seriously, hit the link and then scroll all the way to the bottom and read the reviews.  My personal favorite (once you select Read All Reviews) was the one titled “works about half the time” The text of the review reads:  “I like it but sometimes the banana curves the other way. But when it works, it’s pretty amazing. And it’s yellow.”

As long as people can deliberately be this absurd, then all is right with the world.  I love this life.

Hope your holidays are warm, wonderful, and full of love and laughter…



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